Believe it or not, there is a fine line between being a fantasy sports geek, and being a truly sad and pathetic creature worthy of only scorn, derision, and occasional pity. If you follow this link and think it’s a great idea, you have pole-vaulted across that line.

Seriously, enjoying fantasy sports is one thing (feel free to ask me about why Ken Griffey, Jr. almost caused me to shoot myself in the face with a nail gun); but buying bling to celebrate championships that exist only amongst a select cadre of your buddies catapults you into the fifth dimension; a metaphysical plane defined by Dungeons and Dragons, pale skin, and extreme virginity while in your late 30’s.

Here’s a tip. If you have one of these rings, or are thinking of buying one, get a real job, move out of your parent’s basement and, just once try kissing a girl. They don’t have “cooties.”

Well, some do, but the experience would still be good for you.