When Florida upset Georgia last year to take the title, we were already describing the Gators as a “tomato can.” If you recall, in boxing a “tomato can” refers to a low-ranked fighter with whom contenders pad their records in order to earn a title shot. In this case, the Gators did the most tomato can-ny thing imaginable…they lost to another tomato can.

It shouldn’t shock anybody this in the first championship for the South Florida Bulls; the program didn’t even exist until 1997. Oddly enough, that’s the same year Brigham Young University held the Dubsism Heavyweight Championship, marking the last time this feat was accomplished by a non-“power conference” team.

Obviously, he who lives by the tomato can dies by the tomato can, because even the most dented still has the chance to fall of the shelf just right landing squarely between the champ’s eyes. Then a can wears the belt. As goes Florida so does South Florida.

More importantly, if we are to see a world in which tomato cans will abound, Miami (FL) needs to beat the Bulls come Saturday. Otherwise, the belt is like to spend the season rattling around the depths of the American Athletic Conference. In other words, thanks to the original tomato can Florida Gators, the Dubsism Heavyweight Championship belt could be doomed to the miasma of Tuesday afternoon bowl games featuring 7-win “power conference” teams punching down to the South Floridas of the world.

1st Championship

• 1617 : 2025 6-Sep : South Florida 18 , Florida 16

In Case You Didn’t Know

Here at Dubsism, we have our own way of determining who is the #1 team in college football. Eschewing polls, debates, and the general silliness of a subjective means, we decided to go with “you’re the best until somebody beats you.” To do that, we went back to the very first college football game in 1869. Since there were only two teams, it was easy to decide the winner of that game was the best. We just took it from there.

In other words, we determine a champion just like boxing does. We know who was the original #1; tracing the path of the championship was a simple as following the winner. Even today, it remains an exercise in watching #1’s game, and crowning a new champ if they lose.

As is the tradition, here’s the full scroll of all 1,614 college football championship matches going all the way back to that very first game in 1869. Scroll down, click Page 2, and get ready for the biggest mega-scroll of your life…