Dubsism

What your view of sports and life would be if you had too many concussions

Signs We Are Near The End Of Civilization: Handicapped Curling

Before you get all of on a snit, this isn’t about being handicapped, or about curling. Rather it is about a combination that should never be. Some things were made to go together, like pizza and beer. Conversely, some things weren’t, like full frontal nudity and Betty White. Wheelchairs and curling are the latter.

Specifically, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with either on its own, but together, they form something unholy. Don’t get me wrong, I understand the importance of remaining active, and due to having had several reconstructive leg surgeries in my life, I know what being confined to a wheelchair is like.

But this combination is just a monstrous disservice to both; it completely removes any of the skill from curling while finding a way to make being wheelchair-bound even less active. Honestly, I get more physical activity sleeping off a drunk than you could get here, and even worse, the dude in the picture above ISN’T EVEN HOLDING A BEER! Isn’t curling without beer a federal offense in Canada?  He could strap a whole cooler to his chair and do this right; if you are going to adapt, do it in a positive way.

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What your view of sports would be if you had too many concussions

5 comments on “Signs We Are Near The End Of Civilization: Handicapped Curling

  1. Chris Humpherys
    February 7, 2011

    When I first read the title of this post, I thought you were talking about handicapping curling, which would probably be even MORE of a sign we’re rolling downhill with steam.

    A buddy of mine once said, if you’re betting on women’s basketball, you have a gambling problem.

    If you’re betting on curling, you probably need the number asap. Hang on, let me get it for you.

    Like

    • JW
      February 7, 2011

      So, you’re judging me rather than telling me if Sweden +2 at Canada (men’s) a good $50 play…salty.

      Like

  2. Chris Humpherys
    February 7, 2011

    Has anyone ever counted how many times those two sweepers in front of the little bocce thing actually scrub the ice before the puck (it’s a puck, right?) stops or hits another puck? It’d have to be 1,000 or so per toss, right? Those guys are probably pretty damn good at brushing their teeth.

    The Super Bowl of curling has that prop bet.

    Like

    • JW
      February 7, 2011

      See, I always thought the women would be good at sweeping/mopping floors. Its really the same motion.

      BTW, its a stone, not a puck, but curling in Florida is what Scuba diving is in North Dakota.

      Like

  3. chappy81
    February 8, 2011

    Anytime you have some inside info on a curling bet I’m game! It’s hard for me to watch a game without having something on it. I guess I won’t be betting on curling until the olympics comes around, but when that rolls around I’ll know where to go!

    Like

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This entry was posted on February 7, 2011 by in Olympics and tagged , , .

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