Frankly, I couldn’t believe this when I first read it. “Nahhh, somebody hacked this page, or I’ve been somehow re-directed to the Onion” I thought to myself. But, no, the page was still Yahoo! News. I literally could feel my blood pressure pulling into the left lane and putting the pedal to the metal toward… Read More Signs We Are Near The End Of Civilization: Genderless Babies
We as a nation should all get behind the Dallas Mavericks for one reason. If the Heat win the Championship in the first season after the “Decision,” we will be subject to a full summer of the “LeBron” show, from which the resultant pandemic nausea may kill numbers of Americans unseen since the Spanish Flu… Read More Why You Shouldn’t Cheer For: The Miami Heat
When one talks of “flagship franchise,” it is hard to discuss the National Basketball Association without mentioning the Los Angeles Lakers in that capacity. The Lakers were the first dynasty in the history of the league, stemming all the way back to their original home from which the team name came; the City of Lakes,… Read More Open Letter to Los Angeles Laker Fans – Don’t Lose Sight of the 20 Guys You Should Really Hate
Let’s face it, college programs cheat. There’s an old saying in college sports, “If you ain’t cheating, you ain’t trying.” Recently, we here at Dubsism hung a tag of “dirty program” on Auburn, but to be fair, they are far from the only one. Hell, they probably are all dirty; just because your school may… Read More The 10 Dirtiest College Programs Plus The Ones Of Which I’m Most Suspicious
In today’s “strange, but true” moment, it seems that Portland Trailblazer forward Gerald Wallace may have a future as an FBI Agent. I know, the FBI and the NBA seems like an odd combination; you would think if there were a law enforcement agency infiltrating basketball it would be the DEA, what with all those… Read More I Was a Power Forward For The FBI
The other day, Duke uber-stud Kyrie Irving announced that he is leaving the hallowed halls in Durham for the Franklin-green pastures of the NBA. Of course, this led some Coach-K-turd-swallowing dickface at The Chronicle (Dukes’ campus newspaper) to pen what has to be the purest, most uncut essence of what every self-respecting person in America… Read More If You Didn’t Understand Before Why Everybody Hates Duke, You Will Now
Now that my brackets are so much smoldering wreckage, and now that my teams are out, it is time for a big dose of what the original purpose of this blog was: a profanity-filled triade about shit I don’t like. And since I can’t like this tournament anymore… VCU: Know what a “VCU” is? Fifteen… Read More Trash-Talking the Sweet Sixteen
The sporting world is full of rivalries which engender so much passion there are clear battle lines drawn between the camps. But what happens to those of us who may feel animus toward both sides? Here’s a list of several such examples that make the collective colon here at Dubsism slam shut like a steel… Read More Famous Sports Rivalries In Which I Hate Both Sides
#10) Minnesota Vikings What can I say about the Vikings that I haven’t already said? Go over to the tag cloud on the right, click on the “Minnesota Vikings” tag, and you will see that I’ve written the Vikings’ football miasma time and time again. But that’s because there’s so much to write about. Even… Read More The Ten Most Dysfunctional Franchises In Professional Sports
This piece started as a reply to a blog on this topic over at Helmet And Pads Required, but it grew too long, so now it lives here as it’s own piece. So that you may better understand the perspective from which this is being written. I am a middle-aged, educated black man who has… Read More An Ugly Truth About Race And Sports
It’s no secret that I like to have a radio on in my office while I do what it is that I do, and every once in a while I hear something that I find truly provocative that it rattles around in my head until it falls on to my keyboard. This morning, ESPN Radio’s… Read More Your Colin Cowherd Moment of the Day: If You Don’t Like the NBA, You’re A Racist
Remember the movie “The Day After?” In case you don’t, this 1983 classic cultural phenomenon was a brutally graphic, entirely disturbing account of the effects of a nuclear war on the people of Lawrence, Kansas. It was no accident the makes of this film picked Lawrence; anybody who has been that close to the meltdown… Read More Teams That Grind My Gears: The Kansas Jayhawks
I’m sorry, Indiana. I killed your NBA franchise. Honestly, I didn’t mean to do it; I’m just a jinx for an NBA team if I happen to live in the market. Let’s look at the three applicable cities. It’s really hard to say this about the greater Los Angeles area, because a) the jinx isn’t… Read More Open Letter To NBA Fans: If I Live In Your Market, Your Team Will Suck
Face it…this guy wasn’t born, he was designed in a lab somewhere. There were supercomputers, pocket protectors and lots of taped glasses involved in bringing Griffin to the NBA. But he needs a new number. Not that there’s anything wrong with #32; it’s been worn in all sports by many who were head and shoulders… Read More Blake Griffin Is Wearing the Wrong Number
If you are of my ethnic construct and age, you likely know the term “Paper Bag Test.” Sports has a “paper bag test” all its own, and it is just as unflattering. In this case, the paper bag was used to hide being a fan of a dreadful organization. The following is a list of… Read More Great Moments in the History of Paper Bags
Now that 2010 is in the books, it is time to recognize some truly great achievements in the world of sport that may otherwise go unnoticed. With that, I give you the 2010 Dubsy Awards. The Mickey Klutts Award for Unfortunate Naming Winner: Gregor Fucka I don’t care if he’s almost 40 years old, an… Read More The 2010 Dubsy Awards
Let’s just cut to the chase here…everybody else does some sort of “Year End” list, here’s our obligatory ramble on what we consider to be the 15 most significant sporting occurrances in 2010. Honorable mention: The Vuvuzela What began as a seemingly harmless noisemaker instead became a symbol of what happens when you hold a… Read More The Dubsism Top Fifteen Sports Events of 2010
For those of you who don’t know (in my best Harry Doyle voice), and judging by the ratings that’s most of you, Geno Auriemma is the head coach of the University of Connecticut women’s basketball team. Yesterday, the UConn Huskies won their 88th game in a row, tying the record for consecutive victories held by… Read More Geno Auriemma Thinks You Are All A Bunch Of Misogynists
In all honesty, one can make a bunch of jokes about how the roof of the “Humptydome” coming down is just a metaphor for all the terrible teams that have played under the Teflon Sky. Make a list and see the trail of sporting tears that have called the Metrodome home. The only resident still… Read More The Real Reason The Metrodome Roof Collapsed
It may be that I finally have become the grumpy old man (it doesn’t help that I idolize Joe Paterno), but given some recent past events, I think we are witnessing the destruction of what was once the wonder of sports. Honestly, I’m a middle-aged guy whose formative years were in the late 70’s and… Read More Why Sports Will Suck In The Future
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