Why You Shouldn’t Cheer For…The Indianapolis Colts

First, you must view the video concerning Colts fans’ new source of identity; “The Shoe.”

Paper football player or Colts fan? Either way, just start swinging.

I guess I should be encouraging Captain Dreadlock to crawl out of his bong long enough to post it, but it is soooooo lame I’m amazed it wasn’t done by a Viking fan.

In short, in order to celebrate Indianapolis’ Super Bowl appearance, Dreadlock Guy wants the Colts to be the first team to have a hand signal. As much as I love the creativity, he is 38 years too late. The Houston Oilers debuted such a signal on Monday Night Football in 1972.

This means if you encounter somebody with their thumbs joined and forefingers extended upwards, they are either a paper football player or a Colts fan. In the case of the former, they are just a dry hump with their chubby, freckled girlfriends away from being the uber-sexless turbo-geeks that play Dungeons & Dragons. In the case of the latter, odds are they are just a blobby drunk eager to slur their dissertation on why Payton is “THE Manning.”

In either case, just punch them. We’ll all feel better for it.

About J-Dub

What your view of sports would be if you had too many concussions

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