Guess Who Has a Man-Crush on Tim Tebow?

Color Me Fucking Shocked: Dick Vitale Loves Tim Tebow

Know who loves the Broncos taking Tim Tebow in the first round? Dicky V.  Know who hates the pick? Colin Cowherd. Honestly, I didn’t want to notice this, but after having read Vitale’s pre-draft column extolling the virtues of taking Tejus and listening to Cowherd’s fervent belief Denver may as well have drafted the Flying Nun, you really want to ponder who will prove correct.

Really, you have to ask yourself who has the “cred” on this topic. As a radio host, Cowherd gets to spend hours every week talking about the topic du jour, and lord knows there is a dearth of NFL talk on American sports radio these days. Meanwhile, Vitale would represent the draft’s anti-Kiper; while still loud, obnoxious, and generally clueless – he’s missing that delightful Kiper mane. That’s right, football fans, ESPN thought better of leaving you you refuge from this mope, deciding rather to let his idiocy bleed over from the hardcourt.

I’m inclined to go with Cowherd on this one; if you aren’t consider the following gems Vitale just had to ejaculate into print: 

Whether it is Mel Kiper, Todd McShay, Jon Gruden, Herm Edwards, or someone else, let me tell you, they do their homework. All the football experts put in so many hours, breaking down the strengths and weaknesses of the draft prospects…It is so difficult when the talent is so close in the evaluation process. But I believe that a number of NFL teams will look back and realize they made a mistake by not grabbing Tim Tebow in the first round…I am hearing people say that Tim Tebow will go in the third round, but there is something about that kid that you can’t teach. He is a winner with a fierce, competitive drive to be the best he can be.

In other words, Vitale believes that “heart” and determination can overcome the one issue that all the football guys are pinging on. The key is its all of them. Usually one expects disagreement amongst your Kiper-ocracy, but when they all say Tebow isn’t an NFL quarterback; when even the Tejus supporters couch their answers with words like “potential” or “with the right coaching,” there must be something waaaay scary they see something not visible to the untrained eye. Even Dicky V slips into that trap in his empassioned defense.

He is so durable, too — he has a great body and the ability to take a pounding. His physical nature tells me he can get the job done at the next level…If I was a coach, I would love to have a player like him on my team. You can talk about his mechanics and bring up his flaws, but he is a player who wants to learn and get better. You can rectify those problems, but you can’t make up for a guy who has no heart and desire, especially after he gets the cash in his pocket, baby!

Who cares if his passing delivery is so big and slow it reminds one of a sloth cracking open a coconut with a rock? See, Vitale wants you to believe that what you do on the field is as important as what kind of human being you are.

Those athletes who get the money and run don’t have what it takes to be a classy pro. They hit the nightclub scene and go out and party. To me, Tebow is the kind of guy you want, no matter what the sport is. He is the kind of guy who can take his team into the winner’s circle.

Do you think that was a not-so-thinly veiled Roethlisberger reference? Does this mean that just because a guy who is an admitted “project” player deserved first-round money just because he doesn’t rack up the rape accusations? Cowherd said last week that Roethlisberger got Tebow drafted. I don’t think anybody ever explained to Vitale that it usually doesn’t help your case to keep agreeing with the other side.

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