What your view of sports and life would be if you had too many concussions
If you’re my age, you may remember the “generic” grocery phenomena of the economically-toxic President Carter years of the late 1970’s. Instead of dealing with the core issues of what was ruining the American economy of the day, the idea that the cost of product packaging and the competition between brands was accused of being the reason why consumer costs were exploding.
We can argue all the live long day about economic theory, but the whole idea behind “generic” products was that by eliminating the expenses of branding, marketing and the like that costs could be controlled. This was about as effective a tool against rampant inflation as is pushing back the ocean with a broom, which is why “generic” products were relegated to the dust-bin of history.
However, when it comes to “ineffective,” nothing defines that term like this year’s Gambling Challenge. Like “generic” groceries, the challenge defies the economic sensibilities of some by hitting the big bets, but still coming up short. That’s how the bankroll took a $118 haircut, thanks to hitting some of the bigger plays, but tanking yet again on a “Payday of the Week” thanks to my mistaken belief that the Mike Leach’s “Air Raid” offense which hung 40 on LSU might actually score against the likes of Kentucky.
So much for that. When it was all said and done, the J-Dub Challenge Bankroll stands at a still healthy $5,439 from the original 5K.
What it all boils down to is gambling is like the generic version of Spam. That Hormel “delight” of ground pork shoulder in a blue can is enough of a mystery on it’s own. But the stuff in the non-descript can took mystery to a whole new level; you weren’t even sure it was actually meat.
That’s where I am today. I don’t really care what’s under that gold pull-tab lid as long as the can says “Gambling.” Besides, the “generic” people made a lot of this stuff. It was a weird greenish color, and it tasted slightly like floor wax, but the can read “Beer” and it did the job. It wasn’t “name-brand” and had no commercials full of bikini models, but what the hell? If you’re a gambler, you’re willing to try mystery meat, beer imported from Where-ever-istan, or anything else which might help bank a few bucks.
So, crack open a can of whatever and tackle the mystery!
LEGAL DISCLAIMER (mandated by our very own Small Town Pizza Lawyer):
Thanks to the Supreme Court, gambling is no longer illegal at Bushwood, sir. However, the Supreme Court can’t really help me unless one of them is willing to keep Mrs. J-Dub from braining me with a cast-iron skillet if she found out how many dimes I’m dropping on college football. That means that as far as she knows, all wagers are mythical in nature and this is in no way, shape, or form a gambling advice column. In other words, if you lose your own “real” money, that’s nobody’s fault but yours, so don’t yell at me when we meet at the plasma center on Monday.
Having said that, let’s get ready to gamble…
The Dubsism College Football Heavyweight Champ Bet:
As the current champion is Ohio State, and as of this writing the B1G Ten is saying they will begin begin play on October 23rd…well, this feature will just have to wait.
J-Dub’s Payday of the Week:
Kentucky at Tennessee (-6) O/U 45.5
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