It may be that I finally have become the grumpy old man (it doesn’t help that I idolize Joe Paterno), but given some recent past events, I think we are witnessing the destruction of what was once the wonder of sports. Honestly, I’m a middle-aged guy whose formative years were in the late 70’s and… Read More Why Sports Will Suck In The Future
If you recall, we here at Dubsism have gone through the history of college football to determine a number #1 team in the style that boxing uses, namely, you are #1 until somebody beats you, then that team becomes #1. Last week, for the first time ever, the heavyweight title of College Football belonged to… Read More The “World’s Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party” Is Now A Title Fight
In today’s installment of why fat guys can still be world-class athletes, what better example than baseball? After all, not only are we on the cusp of the World Series, but the greatest baseball player in the history of ever was decidedly a fat guy. For your perusal, here is the full roster for a… Read More The All-Time, All Fat Guy Baseball Team
I’ll be honest; I don’t really give a shit about the Washington Redskins because, well, let’s be even more honest, there hasn’t been a reason to pay attention to them in close to twenty years. But they have a rabid and devoted fan base and I share something with at least one member of that… Read More Open Letter To Albert Haynesworth: “You’re a Washed-Up Has-Been Asshole”
We have a critical problem in this country. We have far too many people who think they are perfectly qualified for jobs that they don’t have the first clue how to do. You can thank video games for that. Would you pay to listen to a Guitar Hero concert? Would you trust a pilot trained… Read More Open Letter To Football Fans: You Could Not Be A Coach Despite How Good You Are At Madden
Who doesn’t know the internet is the “wild west” for anonymous slander and blatant nastiness? Who wouldn’t figure out that even a Joe Blow opening a Twitter account with a “come and get me” invitation to every blowhard vitriol dealer with a keyboard is simply asking for trouble. Add to that the summer-long LeBron fest… Read More In 25 Words Or Less, LeBron James Is Either A Whiner Or An Idiot Because…
So, a professional athlete who is worth millions of dollars can’t get a woman. That officially makes going to the gym today exceptionally pointless. If T.O.’s washboards abs and seven-figure salary can’t get him laid, why the hell am I killing myself on the Stairmaster? Flamboyant footballer Terrell Owens has tapped a matchmaking service to… Read More Signs We Are Near The End Of Civilization: Terrell Owens Hires “Find-A-Date”
Let’s be honest…one of the reasons women drive men crazy is because they always want mutually exclusive things. If you don’t believe that, just ask a single woman under the age of 30 what her “dream” man would be like, and you will get a litany of things that simply don’t go together. Comedian Dave… Read More Great…Now The NFL Is Acting Like A Woman. Joe Paterno To The Rescue!
If there ever were a sport which have a love affair with its record book, it would be baseball. It takes two guys to carry the official baseball record book, not only because baseball spans three centuries, but because baseball historians keep track of everything. One might think after all that record-keeping and record-breaking that… Read More The Real Story on Baseball’s “Unbreakable” Records
20) The Rose Bowl – Pasadena, California Much your grandfather who fought in World War II, The Rose Bowl is all about what once was. The fact that we keep sticking modern Super Bowls in this ancient edifice means once every few years is not reminder enough of how antiquated this stadium is. If it… Read More The 20 Worst Sports Venues In America
I’m not going to repost last week’s monster about if College football determined it’s Number#1 like Boxing does, but suffice it to say we’ve had two changes in as many weeks. This week, for the first time ever, the heavyweight title of College Football belongs to The University of Kentucky Wildcats, who earned the title… Read More The Wildcats Do Some Serious Cock-Knocking
When we as a nation take a hard look at why we love certain sports, it comes down to down to some ugly facts. We as a nation identify with the characteristics in sports that we see in ourselves. If you don’t believe that look at the most popular sports in this country. Don’t get… Read More Why Baseball Rules, and How Fox Sports is Destroying It
USA Today is quoting the Minneapolis ESPN Radio affiliate who has reported that Minnesota head coach Tim Brewster will be fired if the Golden Gophers lose at Purdue today. 1500 ESPN reported that the Minnesota football coach would be fired if the Golden Gophers lose to Purdue on Saturday for the team’s sixth… Read More Coaches’ Death Watch Update: Is It “Blindfold and Last Cigarette” Time In Minnesota?
Let this be a lesson to males everywhere. If you get accused of sending pictures of your wang with your cell phone, God will nail you in the crank with a football. It is more proof God hates Brett Favre.
There’s all sorts of polls out there for determining who is #1 in college football. But what if college football determined its top dog the same way boxing did; you are #1 until somebody beats you? Rather that wait for next week’s BCS poll, and since #1 Alabama got beat this weekend, it only made… Read More And The New Heavyweight Champion Is…South Carolina
1) Georgia isn’t as bad as they look. Well, they’ve only beaten Tennessee and Roast Beef State Louisiana-Lafayette, and they aren’t going to a bowl game, but the calls for Mark Richt’s head are premature. I understand how losing to a sorry-ass Colorado team can give one cause to wonder, but settle down, Dawg fans.… Read More Nine Things We’ve Learned About College Football at the Halfway Point
1) The “Sack Dance” is completely out of control. Seriously, what the hell do you call this? The “guy getting hit with a cattle prod?” “The funky gallbladder?” 2) Tom Brady has Douche-Hair. Remember when Tom Brady burst onto the scene as a 6th-rounder injury replacement for Drew Bledsoe? You liked him then; he was… Read More Four Things We’ve Learned About the NFL Heading Into Week Five
This is the problem faced by the NFL. The Roethlisberger incident set the precedent in which the NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell acted swiftly and decisively handing out punishment in a instance where there was determined to be no criminal conduct. Now, you have an issue involving the biggest “box office” draw in the league with some pretty solid evidence of a crime being committed (we checked, it is in fact illegal to send people pictures of your wiener). … Read More Brett Favre’s Penis and Other Things Roger Goodell Doesn’t Want To Touch
Today, the world of sports journalism got a little bit better, because Jay Mariotti is no longer in it. I’m not going to hide behind any pretense; this is pure schadenfreude for me. For years, Mariotti has been that special kind of buttloaf who gives all sports writers a bad name. In fact to call… Read More Praise the Beginning of the “Mariotti-Free” Era
According to ESPN’s Adam Schefter, the Vikings are expected to close a deal with New England today to acquire Randy Moss. Forget that Minnesota ran Moss out of town in 2004. Forget that Randy Moss has never once passed the “Net Difference” test. And for now, forget that Randy Moss is in a contract year.… Read More Whenever You Need To See Desparation, Just Look Toward Minnesota
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