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What your view of sports and life would be if you had too many concussions

Signs We Are Near The End Of Civilization: Horrible 80’s Music Goes “Tebow”

There’s really nothing quite like the special level of hell reserved for when a current phenomenon inspires the return of one with a “retro” feel. Take the current Tim Tebow-mania which as we speak has a death-grip on the throat of the sports world. How would you feel about marrying that to the soundtrack from one of those god-awful 1980’s “Brat Pack” movies?

Well wonder no more…to the horror of eardrums around the world, it’s happened.

Remember “St. Elmo’s Fire?”  Apparently John Parr, the author of that bit of ear-rape, happens to be a serious fan of the Denver Broncos, and therefore a dedicated Tebow-phile. To honor his quarterback phenomenon, he’s rewritten the song to honor him.

Just because you don’t want to experience the feeling of a rabid weasel clawing your eardrums is no reason to miss out on this gold-medal level lyrical nut-kicking.

Growin’ up
Gotta keep your eye on the ball
Make it fly,
Give it everything, give your all
But maybe sometimes if you feel the pain
You’ll find you’re all alone
Everything has changed

Play the game
You know you can’t quit until it’s won
Soldier on
Only you can do what must be done

You know I’m out there
Down on one knee
A prisoner
And I’m tryin’ to break free

CHORUS:

I can see a new horizon
Underneath the blazin’ sky
I’ll be where the eagle’s
Flyin’ higher and higher

Gonna be a man in motion
All I needs my Broncos team
Take me where my future’s lyin’
Tim Tebows Fire

Oooh…

Burnin’ up
Don’t know just how far that I can go
(Just how far I go)
Soon be home
Only just 4 downs to go
I can make it
I know I can
You broke the boy in me
But you won’t break the man

(CHORUS)

I can see a new horizon
blazin on the Mile High
I’ll be where the eagle’s
Flyin’ higher and higher

Gonna be your man in motion

All I needs my Broncos team
Take me where my future’s lyin’
Tim Tebows Fire

I can climb the highest mountain
These Broncos cant be beat
I can feel St Elmo’s Fire burnin’ in me
Burnin’ in me

Just once in his life
A man has his time
And my time is now
And I’m comin’ alive

I can hear the music playin’
I can see the banners fly
Feel like a man again

I’ll hold my head high
Gonna be a man in motion
These broncos can’t be beat
Take me where my future’s lyin’
Tim Tebow’s fire

(CHORUS)

I can climb the highest mountain
Cross the wildest sea
I can feel St. Elmo’s Fire burnin’ in me

Burnin’
Burnin’ in me
I can feel it burnin’
Oooh, burnin’ inside of me

I don’t know about you, but I will be spending the rest of the afternoon stuffing a bottle brush in my ears.

About J-Dub

What your view of sports would be if you had too many concussions

9 comments on “Signs We Are Near The End Of Civilization: Horrible 80’s Music Goes “Tebow”

  1. chappy81
    January 11, 2012

    Now that is how I wanted to start my morning. Hopefully it doesn’t get stuck in my head now!!

    Like

  2. ThePowerWire
    January 11, 2012

    I wonder if he seriously thought making this song was a good idea. It’s just so good and so bad all at the same time. Linked at my site http://www.thepowerwire.com

    Like

    • JW
      January 11, 2012

      “I wonder if he seriously thought making this song was a good idea?”

      Which time? There’s a reason I use the term “ear-rape.”

      Like

  3. sportsattitudes
    January 11, 2012

    OK, I’m down with sitting back and enjoying the “Tebow experience” but for GOD’S sake it does not need to be accompanied by music. Not even angelic instruments.

    Like

  4. brief22
    January 11, 2012

    This is insane. I’m a big Tebow fan but Tebowmania has gone too far.

    Like

  5. The Tebowmania thing is beyond just a little bit out of control. I have a feeling it’s about to come to a screeching halt here in about four days.

    To be honest, I didn’t have a problem with it in the beginning but it got old really really fast.

    Meehan

    Like

  6. sportsglutton
    January 12, 2012

    Dear Lord…perhaps the Mayans were actually right.

    Like

  7. Have you heard Jimmy Fallon’s David Bowie remake of Tim Tebow yet?

    Like

    • JW
      January 13, 2012

      No, and the thought makes my colon slam shut like a steel bear trap.

      Like

Comments are closed.

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