The J-Dub Gambling Challenge 2022: The “Roller Coaster” Edition

This challenge is a season-long endeavor. But within that marathon, there are plenty of sprints. But despite the length of the race, they all have one thing in common, and it the soul of the thrill that is gambling. It’s all about the “roller coaster.”

Over the course of a season, the ups and down are as easy to see as following the oscillations of the J-Dub Gambling Challenge Bankroll. But you can still take the ride in the span of one game. The 4th quarter of last week’s Ohio-State-Penn State tilt exemplifies that. If you were like me holding a ticket which had the Nittany Lions staying inside the spread, Sean Clifford’s “pick-six” with under three minutes to go was a complete belly-drop.

But then Clifford had his day of atonement by taking Penn State on a spread-saving drive in the final two minutes. Granted, as a Penn State fan, losing to the goddamn Buckeyes is never a good thing, but as Mrs. J-Dub can attest, a common saying in my house is “the heart can want what it wants, but business is business.

That’s a not-so-sugar coated way of saying gambling is about cashing winners, not about cheering for your favorite team. Now, as far as the afore-mentioned bankroll is concerned, last week was a definite “up;” I took home $825 to put the bankroll at a season-high $6,245.

That’s a pretty nice peak from the original $5K, but there’s one thing we all know about roller-coasters…for every “up,” there has to be a “down.” That’s why for a gambler, it’s never about the ups and downs…the key is being able buy a ticket for the ride.

LEGAL DISCLAIMER (mandated by our very own Small Town Pizza Lawyer):

Thanks to the Supreme Court, gambling is no longer illegal at Bushwood, sir. However, the Supreme Court can’t really help me unless one of them is willing to keep Mrs. J-Dub from braining me with a cast-iron skillet if she found out how many dimes I’m dropping on college football.

That means that as far as she knows, all wagers are mythical in nature and this is in no way, shape, or form a gambling advice column. In other words, if you lose your own “real” money, that’s nobody’s fault but yours, so don’t yell at me when we meet at the plasma center on Monday.

If you think you have a gambling problem, go find the 800 number on your own. I’m not a goddamn public service announcement.

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The Standard Plays

• Air Force (-7) at Army O/U 40.5 $50 Air Force, $50 Over
• Texas Tech at Texas Christian (-9.5) O/U 69 $100 Texas Christian
• Florida at Texas A&M (-3.5) O/U 55 $75 Florida
• North Carolina (-6.5) at Virginia O/U 59.5 $50 North Carolina
• Kentucky (-1.5) at Missouri O/U 42.5 $100 Under
• Baylor at Oklahoma (-3.5) O/U 61.5 $50 Baylor
• West Virginia at Iowa State (-7) O/U 51 $50 Under
• Michigan State at Illinois (-16.5) O/U 41.5 $75 Michigan State, $75 Illinois
• Oklahoma State (-2) at Kansas O/U 65 $50 Kansas
• Syracuse at Pittsburgh (-5.5) O/U 51.5 $100 Syracuse
• Tennessee at Georgia (-6.5) O/U 65.5 $100 Georgia, $100 Over
• Texas (-2.5) at Kansas State O/U 55 $50 Texas, $50 Over
• Washington State (-4.5) at Stanford O/U 50.5 $25 Washington State, $25 Under
• Brigham Young at Boise State (-7.5) O/U 55.5 $50 Boise State
• Alabama (-16.5) at Louisiana State O/U 57 $100 Alabama
• Florida State (-7.5) at Miami (FL) O/U 53 $50 Over
• UCLA (-11) at Arizona State O/U 66 $100 UCLA
• California at Southern California (-21.5) O/U 61.5 $75 Southern California, $75 Over

The Almost Always Punitive Purdue Bet

Since I live in the heart of Big Ten country, almost literally in the shadow of Ross-Ade stadium, those around me who know I’m a gambler will invariably ask me about the Boilermakers, so I might as well bet on them…

Iowa at Purdue (-4) O/U 40.5 $100 Purdue, $100 Under

The Dubsism College Football Heavyweight Champ Bet:

We went back to the very first college football game in 1869, and the premise is simple…you’re the champ until somebody beats you. The current champion is the Oregon Ducks

Oregon (-31.5) at Colorado O/U 61.5 $50 Oregon

J-Dub’s Payday of the Week:

It’s like the game says…the idea is to hang on to your cash. That means this is the “big play” of the week; the one that should make today “Payday.”

Penn State (-14) at Indiana O/U 54.5 $750 Under

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